Just over a month ago I remember being a bundle of nerves, leaving my best friend and everything I was used too for a city I hardly knew and the idea that it was the next step I needed to take.
High School was alright. But when I look back on it - there wasn't much positive. Moving to a new city was terrifying. Not knowing anyone. I never believed I was capable of meeting as many amazing people as I did. I never believed I was capable of having that many people like me.
When people pick on you for being yourself you never truely believe that you can be yourself. But Wellington, I was myself, I embraced myself. My loud laugh, annoying screams and in your face passion for business. I tried to connect with everyone and anyone.
The "hello my name's Rebecca, do you want to be friends" line that didn't work so well 8 years ago at Junior High became my best friend. Everyone was in the same boat. Everyone was nervous and majority of the people I talked too made everything so much easier.
Now being sucked away from it all - locked down in my house. Back in my old room that doesn't even feel like mine anymore. Dreaming about Capital. Missing the waterfront. Wishing I could puff up the Dixon Steps one more time. It feels like possibly that month I just experienced. The month of amazing memories, with people I didn't even know existed - was a dream. Maybe I made it up. It feels surreal that all of that could have happened in a month.
The cardboard stash, drunken nights to town, lectures, tutorials, all nighters, 6am chats, a different spot in the corridor overtaken with giggles every night, the singing, movie nights, Priscilla, Interfloor touch. Floor 5 in general. The people. The food. The RA's.
I miss it. I miss everyone and I miss Wellington.
This isn't how it is meant to be.
I was meant to fly to Wellington and not comeback for a long time. I was meant to be starting my new life. One with new people, in a new city, in a new building. This isn't how it is me